Special Report: The Boy Who Ate Phoenix

I’ve been to Phoenix, AZ exactly twice.  Both times for the same reason; to see Madonna.  I mean see her in concert.  I didn’t, like, go visit Madonna at her lavish Arizona compound where we’d do yoga and I’d film Instagram reels of her behaving in a manner unbecoming a pop icon her age.  I don’t fantasize about being besties with Madonna.  That would be silly.  I do however enjoy a rich fantasy life where I am Taylor Swift’s fabulous gay uncle.  We’d talk about boys over cheap red wine and pints of Ben and Jerry’s.  My dog would fight with her cats.  I don’t know if Taylor Swift even owns cat, let alone multiple cats.  Just a hunch.  I’d tell her how proud I was of her for re-recording her first 5 albums to gain full ownership of her masters while gently reminding her that Prince did that first and probably better.  Y’know, normal Uncle stuff.  That seems like something that would happen in Phoenix.

What DID happen in my recent visit to Phoenix was time spent with lovely friends, experiencing the Pride parade and a long weekend spent with my partner eating a city other than San Diego.  Since I only know two people who live there (shout out to Michael and Daniel for being fantastic hosts and adventurous dining companions), I took their suggestions, along with whittling down a lot of top 10 lists from the always trusty internet, and mapped out an impossibly long list of places to try.  What you are about to read are the places that made the final cut and what we thought.  By sheer happenstance, most of them are within a mile or two of each other!

First up Hula’s (5114 N. 7th Street, Phoenix.) Boasting a menu of fused island and mainland flavors, Hula’s offers up a twist on the classic tiki bars and restaurants of yesteryear.  The vibe is cute, kitschy and festive.  I saw a cocktail on the menu called Dr. Funk and felt almost obligated to order it on the name alone.  Coconut rum, vodka, crème de banana, coconut, pineapple and orange juice served in a tall tiki mug.  It tasted like the luau scene in Grease 2.  In other words, absolute perfection.  David and I shared the samurai beef sticks (grilled Mongolian beef skewered with pineapple and scallions).  Really tasty but the star of this appetizer was the lime curry dipping sauce. 

I could not have ever imagined myself walking into a tiki bar and eating tacos but here we are.  The Crunchy Spicy Chicken Tacos sounded too interesting to pass up.  Marinated roasted chicken, jack cheese, taco slaw and salsa roja in a deep fried corn tortilla.  The freshness of the chicken made all the difference, super juicy and flavorful.  The hot crunch of the fried tortilla hit perfectly with the cold crunch of the slaw.  A nice kick from the jack cheese tied it all together.  Fantastic.    For his main course, David chose more traditional island fare with Duke’s Luau Pork Plate (slow roasted pulled pork, soy glaze, pineapple with rice and slaw on the side).  Tender and well seasoned, it also offers up a generous portion of food.  Hula’s is officially on my “must return again” list when next I am in the city of Phoenix.  Strong start. 

Fried Tacos. At a Tiki Bar. Day one and Arizona is already out here doing the most.

Capping off night one was dessert at Sweet Republic (6054 N 16th Street, Phoenix.)  Handcrafted ice cream scoops, sundaes and shakes with unique flavors in a casual setting (“casual” meaning “minus the panic attack I’m having internally when faced with having to choose ice cream flavors or really anything at all.”)  Actually, it was pretty easy to make this choice.  I got a cup of Blueberry Lemon Custard Pie (Lemon custard ice cream with swirls of blueberry and chunks of waffle pie crust).  The ice cream base was so light and creamy, it ate more like gelato but still had that nice richness of the custard.  The lemon was front and center with sweet tangy goodness and the pie crust chunks kept it all in check.  Really, really great.   David got two scoops: the Hummingbird Cake (think carrot cake but with pineapple instead of carrots) and the Bananas Foster.  While the Bananas Foster was good, the clear winner for him was the Hummingbird Cake ice cream, which exactly mirrors the taste of its namesake cake.  This place is worth seeking out. 

It’s pie but it’s not. It’s gelato but it’s not. It’s wrong but it’s right.

Day two started with breakfast at Matt’s Big Breakfast (3118 E Camelback Road, Phoenix.)  While the first two places were recommended by my friends, this was the first place I went to that came from the Phoenix top ten lists Google showed me.  Located in the Biltmore Plaza, Matt’s Big Breakfast offers “Scratch cooking and honest ingredients,” according to their website.  I have to agree.  Not one thing on my plate looked like it was trying to sell me Bitcoin or a timeshare in Florida.  I ordered the Five Spot Platter (breakfast sandwich on a roll with two eggs, thick cut bacon, American cheese, grilled and onions alongside some home fries).  I also had to order a short stack of blueberry griddle cakes because I love them.  My overall impression from my meal was that it was solid but nothing outstanding.  I do love crunchy bacon but some of the bacon on my sandwich was so burned, it belonged in an urn.  Not a deal breaker.  Again, I love crunchy bacon and the meal was well done.  The griddle cakes were tasty and well made but I’d had them before many, many times at many, many places. 

I love me some griddle cakes. These were delicious, if uninspired.

Wanting something a little more original than a basic bacon-and-eggs breakfast, David ordered the Chop and Chick (two eggs and a skillet-seared Iowa pork chop served alongside toast and a choice of potato.)  He found the pork chop to be really well-seasoned and delicious (I tried some and can confirm.  Also, props for offering a different protein for breakfast!)  He was also appreciative that his request for extra crispy hashbrowns was honored and they were able to offer a side of banana slices instead of the evil gluten of toast.  Final verdict: While I’d certainly come back to Matt’s Big Breakfast, I wouldn’t make it a point to visit.

Dinner was a local recommendation, George Yang’s Chinese Cuisine  (6048 N 16th Street, Phoenix)  With a specialty in Chinese food, George Yang’s also offers dishes of Thai, Burmese and Vietnamese descent.  An appetizer that caught my eye early on while perusing the menu was the New York Style Egg Roll, made with shrimp, pork and PEANUT BUTTER.  Yeah.  While my New York native friend Michael swore he ate them like that all the time back East, David (also a New York native) had never heard of that.  Now, I’ll admit, East Coast Chinese food and West Coast Chinese food are worlds apart, even though both are awesome in their own ways.  But, yeah, I have never heard of peanut butter used in this way.  Peanut sauce?  Sure.  Anyway, I had to get to the bottom of this and I have to say it was pretty tasty, particularly when paired with the spicy mustard at the table. 

David and I shared the Chicken Lettuce Wraps (minced chicken with water chestnuts and mushrooms).  This was my favorite dish of the entire meal.  Each ingredient was well-featured and not at all muddied in the overall flavor.  Simple, well-executed and very tasty.  Would come back for that alone.

Simple and delicious lettuce wraps, presented without a questionable regional claim.

For my main course, I forewent my usual go-to, Kung Pao Chicken.  George Yang’s does not serve peanuts in their Kung Pao Chicken and they say as much in the menu.  I can only assume all of the peanuts are being ground to make the peanut butter in the egg rolls. I instead ordered Firecracker Shrimp (served with mushrooms and zucchini in a garlic and ginger sauce.)  The dish was served with a family-style bowl of rice.  “Everything comes with rice…You idiot.” Said our delightfully curt server.  Okay, she didn’t say that last part, but her tone did.  Anyway, it was my bad for asking.  Moving on.  I didn’t quite get the heat the name of the dish promised but the shrimp were well cooked and the sauce was more garlic than ginger but very tasty. 

David ordered the Tres Amigos.  Yes, that classic Chinese favorite, Tres Amigos.  A house specialty at George Yang’s, it’s a trio of shrimp, chicken and beef stir fried with vegetables in a brown sauce.  He found the veggies to be well-cooked without losing their crispness.  The meats were delicious.  It was also cool that they sat our group of 8 at a large circular table with a glass lazy Susan, so it was very easy to sample a little bit of everything (which is how I discovered their orange chicken is legit)

Morning brought brunch at The Genuine (6015 N 16th Street, Phoenix.)  This place was a recommendation from a stranger I met in a bar the night before.  Shout out to Butch the realtor for the list of more places to try!  The Genuine bills itself as an elevated dining experience centered around shareable wood fired cuisine and craft cocktails.  A lot of thought clearly went into the design of this place.  The vibe is retro and cool.  I started with a cocktail called a Spicy Prick, chili-infused blanco tequila, Malibu pineapple, prickly pear puree, fresh lime and a smoked sea salt rim.  Well, “rim” in that it starts at the rim and cascades down the entire side of the glass.  That’s not a complaint btw.  I love salt with my tequila.  This cocktail was delicious.  Sweet heat with a pinch of salt.  Good stuff. 

This drink is one of very few instances I can point to in my life where a positive decision started with tequila.

A shareable brunch option that I partook in was the Jumbo Cinnamon Roll with cream cheese frosting.  While the Genuine and I clearly have differing opinions on what the definition of “jumbo” is, this was really well done.  The frosting was not the usual thick sugar spackle but was instead a creamier, smoother, less aggressive cream cheese icing.  It gave nice flavor without turning it into a total sugar bomb.  Even the light sugar glaze on the roll itself managed to keep itself in check.  I will say, if you’re a diehard fan of the classic cinnamon roll and icing, it might not be your jam.  But kudos to The Genuine for a unique twist on a classic.

Unfortunately, my main course was more forgettable.  I ordered the Classic Breakfast (two eggs, grilled country bread and house bacon).  Everything on the plate was well-made, but nothing about it felt elevated or special.  Granted, I know a “classic breakfast” doesn’t exactly give exciting, new, or special in its description but I felt like I’d had this dish a hundred times at a hundred different places. 

David ordered the Wood Oven Meat and Potatoes Skillet (with roasted potatoes, bacon, sausage, peppers, onions, cheddar cheese and scrambled eggs.)  He loved it – flavorful sausage, crispy potatoes and well-cooked onions. I sampled and it was much better than what I ordered.  It’s worth noting that of our 4 diners, David was the only one who was totally happy with his meal.  I would come back, but only for drinks.

My internet research gave us the choice for dinner.  Not only did it appear in multiple top ten lists but I would later discover that this place was also awarded “Best Restaurant in the Country” by Yelp!  Cocina Madrigal (4044 S 16th Street, Phoenix) offers classic Mexican fare with a focus on tacos and tequila.  It’s off the beaten path and it isn’t much to look at.  Hyper-designed, Instagram-ready hipster vibe this is not, but HOLY SHIT was it ever amazing.

We started with the Oaxaca Fundido which featured Oaxaca cheese melted over longaniza sausage, roasted jalapenos, mushrooms, caramelized onions and epazote (a Mexican herb.)  They serve it in a cast iron skillet with fresh house-made corn tortillas.  The fundido contains an almost absurd amount of flavor.  Smooth, velvety cheese with a touch of tang playing off the rich, earthy mushrooms and sausage and finishing with just a bit of jalapeno heat.  Once we ate our corn tortillas, we were scraping the skillet with our chips.  One of the best dishes of its kind I’ve ever had.  Like, EVER.  The fundido can be ordered on its own or included in a trio with Guacamole and salsa, which is how we had it.  While the guac was legit and the salsa was smoky and delicious, the fundido was the absolute undisputed Diana Ross of this trio. 

Thanks to our server Antonio who gave great suggestions on what to order.  I took his advice and had the Two Enchiladas, one chicken (achiote-braised chicken, jack cheese, New Mexico hatch green chile sauce and chipotle cream) and one wild mushroom (a mix of 3 wild mushrooms, jack cheese, ancho mole cream sauce, avocado relish and sour cream).  They were served alongside traditional rice and beans (the latter of which I asked to be left off and they gladly obliged).  The chicken was so fresh and loaded with great flavor.  It meshed perfectly with the creamy spice of the cheese and sauces.  I’ve never had something so simple, done so expertly.  The mushroom enchilada was absolutely delicious as well.  The umami of the mushrooms paired so well with the mole.  Antonio did right by ya boy with this suggestion.

I know this looks like a plate of Enchiladas you could get at any corner Mexican restaurant but these were next-level, poetry-worthy culinary achievements. Seriously. I’ll be talking about this meal for years.

David had one of the chef’s features – crispy salmon served over mashed potatoes with a roasted tomatillo sauce, topped with Oaxaca shrimp and avocado relish.  He said it was absolutely fantastic.  The tomatillo sauce was flavorful without overpowering the dish and there was a generous amount of shrimp.  

There are only three desserts on the menu at Cocina Madrigal, so we ordered two of them.  The Chocolate Chipotle Pie was smooth, creamy and rich, yet was surprisingly light.  Topped with whipped cream and spicy candied pecans, this dessert was anything but an afterthought.  The other dessert we tried was Classic Churros. These are made to order so they’ll take a minute, but they are well worth the wait.  Filled with a Bavarian cream, the churros were fried to absolute perfection and served alongside a delicious leche dipping sauce.  I will RUN back to this place the next time I’m in Phoenix.  It was the absolute best place I went to and I cannot recommend it enough. 

Our final full day in Phoenix included more local recommendations, starting with brunch at Fez (105 W Portland Street, Phoenix.)  With a menu that includes trendy burgers, cocktails and Mediterranean fare, the restaurant had a very cool vibe and a large crowd inside (always a good indicator).  I started with a cocktail called the B-Spot (blueberry and lime vodkas, blueberry liqueur, muddled blueberries and lime pressed).  I did not see any fruit muddled in this glass but it was bright ICEE-blue and tasted like Hypnotiq, so I have zero complaints.  

I tried two of the appetizers.  One was a success, the other not so much.  The Cauliflower Wings were really great.  Like, surprisingly great.  The panko breading held up and brought lots of great flavor.  The cauliflower drummettes were tender and very well cooked.  Paired with buffalo sauce, this dish was a winner.  The Lettuce Wraps were the only sour note in an otherwise lovely meal.  Diced grilled chicken, almonds, apricots and cherries tossed in pomegranate vinaigrette with romaine lettuce cups.  The chicken was inedible-level dry and the vinaigrette could not revive it.  In fact, David could taste so little of the dressing, he was surprised to learn it was there.  Without the proper flavor of the chicken to balance it, the fruit and nuts  were left to fend for themselves.  Not good.

For his main course, David ordered the weekend-menu-only Fresco Fritatta (oven-baked eggs with sauteed spinach, caramelized onion, crumbled bacon and creamy goat cheese served with a side of roasted potatoes.)  He felt that while the flavors were good, the frittata itself was a bit dry.  He would’ve preferred some cheddar instead of goat cheese and some avocado on top to cut the salt.  He asked for fries instead of the standard roasted potatoes.  He normally orders them “crispy,” but *for some reason* didn’t remember to do that (shout out the cocktails at Fez.) They arrived less done than he prefers (“floppy” to use his words.)  I, on the other hand, love fries like that, so I helped out as clean up crew.

My main course was another weekend-brunch-only item that looked too interesting to pass up.  The Golden Curry Egg Scramble is herbed rice scrambled with eggs, green onions and sweet corn topped with curry sauce.  I added crispy chicken on top.  This was such a cool, new way to enjoy breakfast for me.  While curry for breakfast is common in both Indian and English culture, I come from the very pale state of Rhode Island and this was uncharted territory to me.  (“Hey Alexa, play ‘a whole new world’ from Aladdin.”)  I love curry, I’ve just never had it with rice and eggs and, friends, this will not be the last time I order this dish.  The rice was tender, the eggs were fluffy and the rich, spicy creaminess of the curry pulled it all together.  Plus, my addition of crispy chicken only elevated the dish for me.  It was giving Japanese curry and that is MY JAM.  I’m basically a culinary genius, meshing worldwide cuisine.  Please don’t correct me.  Just let me have this.

Eggs, Rice, Curry and fried chicken. Magic. Absolute magic. I need to know where I can get something like this in San Diego. If you know, holla atcha boy.

Our final dinner in the lovely city of Phoenix was TexAZ Grill (6003 N 16th Street, Phoenix.) While Phoenix is not a place I’d expect to find homestyle Southern food, here we were.  The interior is…a lot.  Neon, Christmas lights, license plates, vintage metal signs, snapshots, it’s all here.  Like, ALL of it.  Even on the ceiling. It’s either paradise or a waking nightmare, depending what specific type of ADHD you have.  I gotta give a shout out to our server.  There were only 4 of us but we ordered a lot and there were multiple substitutions and requests.  If you have ever worked in a restaurant, I know you’ll see the exact red flag that I get in this situation.  He didn’t write anything down.  DANGER WILL ROBINSON.  He got it completely right.  Respect, sir.  I will take my anxiety elsewhere.         

I was told by a local that the chicken fried chicken was where it’s at.  While TexAZ Grill is known for their Chicken Fried Steak, I’ve always preferred the chicken version (see also: “The Great Escape.”)  What I hadn’t anticipated was how much food this would be.  The steak usually is pounded flat and thin to make Chicken Fried Steak.  This dish featured two huge chicken breasts!  Served with steak fries (the undisputed love of my life), a bowl of corn and a biscuit, the chicken is batter fried and smothered in cream gravy (or “country gravy” for you “Try That in a Small Town” folks).  I followed our server’s instructions and sprinkled the can of Zatarain’s creole seasoning he brought atop my gravy.  Again, he did not steer me wrong.

In college, my best friend convinced me to take a Labor Day weekend trip with her back to her hometown of Dothan, Alabama.  Once we rolled into town, we were hungry after the long drive from South Florida.  We stopped for lunch at a restaurant called Po’ Folks.  I ordered the fried chicken sandwich and, for the first time in my young life, had actual Southern fried chicken fried by actual southerners in the actual South.  It was delicious and stuck to my ribs with such tenacity, I could not eat for another 2 days.  Not even kidding.   Aimee teases me about my “tender yankee tummy” to this day.  But that was then, this is now.  My tummy (while still tender at times) is built to handle this and handle it, it did at TexAZ Grill.

The chicken was perfect.  Juicy and delicious.  The breading was on the “just enough” side of “too much” but they did it up right.  It honestly took me right back to that small town in Alabama when I was 20 and thought sweet tea came in a can marked Lipton.  I don’t eat this kind of heavy food often but, if I lived closer, this is the place I’d go.  David ordered the TexAZ Grill Burger.  Made to order and customizable, David’s burger (Taylor’s Version) included avocado, bacon, sauteed onions.  A staunch opponent of steak fries (star-crossed lovers up in this bitch – you don’t even know,)  he instead chose mashed potatoes.  David found the burger patty to be thick and delicious and the toppings were perfect.  The final thing that was ordered at the table was the Mac n’ Cheese.  All you need to know about my feelings on this can be found in my review of Louisiana Purchase earlier this season.  So let’s just leave it at that and move on.

Chicken Fried Chicken is the star of a classic and delicious beige plate. IYKYK.

Overall, TexAZ Grill was legit.  A surprising but delightful discovery that’s worth checking out whether you’re a Southern food novice or a pro.  Big thumbs up.  I was not hungry for at least 24 hours (compared to the 48 hours in Alabama).  You know that that is?  Growth.So if you live, visit or find yourself for some random Madonna-related reason in the city of Phoenix, AZ, keep this post in your back pocket for some helpful suggestions.  Feel free to let me know if I got it right, got it wrong, or missed out on some great hidden gems.  Happy eating, Y’all!

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